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Abigail Lindsey
I had always imagined I would have a little girl and name her after my younger sister, Lindsey.
My sister and I are about three years apart. For as long as I can
remember, we have been best friends.
Growing up, our favorite past time was playing Barbies. Hour and hours would pass as we created movies starring Barbie and Ken falling in love, getting married and having babies. Like Barbie, we both had dreams of falling in love, getting married and having babies.
My life seemed to progress right on schedule—and like always, my
sister followed right behind me. We both met the man of our dreams, we fell in love and got married. And right on schedule, my sister had her first baby; but after almost 7 years of marriage, I still don’t have a little bundle of joy.
It’s odd, but lately I feel like my birth-given title of oldest
sister has been usurped by my best friend. Before my journey with infertility began, I never considered that my best friend would blaze this trail before me. I had always led the way.
These days, I brace myself for the announcement of her second
pregnancy. And I mourn the loss of my own dream to be a mom. But even more, I mourn the loss of sharing the experience of parenthood with my sister.
Although my dreams to become a parent have not come true, I still have hope that one day I will be a mommy to Abigail Lindsey.
“But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it
patiently.” ~Romans 8:25
— Christy N
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