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It Was Supposed to be Easy for Us
I am 28 and my husband is 29. I am one of 8 and I have 15 nephews and nieces; it was supposed to be easy for us...
Every doctor said "It will be easy for you--You are so young" I hate
that because a piece of me really believed it. I know when I sat in the RE's office so many other patients looked at me and were resentful. Most couples in this area were just starting in their 30s and I was in my early 20's (at one point in this journey at least).
They think maybe PCOS but as we found out that was only half the story. I apparently can't stay pregnant either. Numerous IUIs, 5 IVFs, 1 ectopic and few chemicals and 4 miscarriages...still waiting to sing that lullaby.
I know the sex of two of our losses..oh how I wish I didnt...We found out that at least 2 of them were normal babies...for some reason my body did not allow them to grow. We tried everything that is legal in the U.S. Almost used my sister who is in her 40s as a gestational carrier. At the office they would have thought I was HER surrogate!
I struggle daily with forgiving myself for putting my husband and my family through this...My sister-in-law was so sad for us when she became pregnant with her 2nd and we were still waiting.
We are now trying to adopt (one failed match) I cant wait untill I hand my husband our child...maybe then I can find forgiveness...
Love your book...saving it to read that final chapter one day...
— Libby K
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